Archive for the ‘After Dickhead’ category

Surfercam Is A Dirty, Dirty Voyeur!

December 19, 2006

Probably not such a great shock to anyone whos read his blog. Last I saw, he had a picture of Pamela Anderson with her tits trying to burst out (was there any other kind of photo of pammy? Isnt that like Paris with undies on?)

But I digress.

Surfer isnt the only one who has asked for more details about my naughtyness. What can I say? Im a bad, bad girl. HOORAY!!!

So what exactly have I been getting up to lately? Well, Ive been fighting pretty severely with Dickhead. Its seriously so ridiculous. Again, let me warn you,  Afrikaaner/Lebanese unions does not smooth sailing make. We are both proud and stubborn, mostly stubborn, and its such a stupid thing, but its at an impass and neither of us can give in, no matter how hard we try. I know with only a small amount of time available to me I should just give in so that I get what I want, but I just cant. Partly because its just not me, and partly because I honestly couldnt handle it if my worries were valid and I was stupid enough to ignore them. Its a case of wondering being undesirable yet able to be coped with, whereas the alternative is simply unbearable. And call me stupid/selfish/deluded/whatever, its my life (whats left of it) and fuck you all thats what im doing with it.

Mind you, I AM in love with him, and it takes an awful lot to take my mind off him. Cue the crazyness. (im going to preface this with the fact that Bugalugs is my first priority, and we have been having an awful lot of fun. Part of the reason I dont tell you is because, well, icecream for breakfast and rides on Thomas the Tank Engine may be fun for 6 year olds, but doesnt make for good blog fodder. The other part is because, well, sometimes – and i do this with other things too – sometimes its nice to keep things just to yourself. i like knowing its special, just between us. And no-one can spoil it that way either)

What the fuck is with them all being Lebanese like Dickhead? For Fucks Sake People! And special thanks to MIN who has suggested format etc for this post and is helping type it coz im fucked.

So the one who calls me sweetie is TOYBOY. The little tard told me at first he was 28, and after the deed was done, decided to fess up to being 23. Oh lordy. Someone could have told me that! My widdle sister is 23! It makes me feel old. shaddup.  He is very gentle, and his most memorable comment was “mmmm, thats so good…..” ok, all sounds normal, right? Then “Honey, your hair is so soft, i love it…” WHAT THE FUCK? Put that down to strangest blow job compliment EVAH! So Thankyou random number one, whos not so random seeing as weve known each other a while now, and this isnt the only occasion weve mucked about. Commendation? Good with his hands. C’mon ladies, we all know many think they are but arent, dont you love finding one that is?

So the one who calls me smartarse is ROCKIN ROBIN and is the only Aussie. He is Mr Better Endowed, and believe me, that night was one to remember. Hes a big boy (yes in THAT way) and also in everything else. He stands at over 6’8″ and has size 14 shoes. He has been jetsetting around the world, and does a mean South African accent. He and I spend our time verbally jousting with one another. We tear strips off each other, and then tear clothes off one another. He goes again, and again, and again, has awesome oral skills and is very focused on the womans pleasure. Fuck me we shagged like rabbits till we literally couldnt shag no more. He takes and gives direction, and is just so easy going that we were both able to completely let go and just enjoy ourselves without holding back. The red marks on my arse from his belt 3 days later were a testament to that. Commendation? Attitude. Attention. Ability. (and ok ok ok, size too lol. too big for a regular but a hellovalotta fun once in a while)

So the one who calls me sexy is FISH, who has been up an awful lot lately, and when he hasnt been here, hes been on the phone. He is the random who makes me laugh, and also there when news broke of what i didnt want to hear about dickhead. He has an awesome attitude, is very complimentary, experimental and relaxed. He treats me like a real lady. He’s awesome fun. It was him who called asking to visit me on Sunday night for some fun. Sunday afternoon a friend rang him mentioning that he was toey, and FISH got it into his head (after recently having a chat with me about threesomes etc) that maybe it could be fun. He suggested it to his friend, then rang me to see what I thought. He had his friend call me, we got along ok. So I decided, hey, what the hell. I told FISH his friend could come. Once here, full credit must go to FISH for running the show. I was nervous as all fuck, truth be told, especially seeing as id never met FISHs friend, or even seen a photo (just knew him by FISHs description). Fish had us in the living room, chatting for a bit till everyone was comfortable. Then he left his friend and I to get aquainted in the bedroom before joining us. Once everyone had settled in, it was compliments ahoy for Honey, thankyou very much! Let me just say, a girl cant really go wrong with 2 cocks and 4 hands, all focused on her! Making sure she shares her attentions equally can be tricky, though, and a girl can get a little spoiled for choice. Im not giving all the details (well, not to everyone LOL) but some memorable moments in no particular order include:

FRIEND “Fuck man, shes good alright….. god, I’m gunna cum already”
FISH “man, you arent going to get to blow for ages yet. Just lay back and settle in. Trust me, your in for something special” (awww, how nice, you think im special lol)

FRIEND “You fuck her first man, shes your woman”
FISH “i was going to anyway bro” (WTF???? do I get a say here? lol)

FISH “man, I cant get naked when theres a guy watching me. STOP LOOKING BRO!”
FRIEND “bro, do you want me to…”
FISH “MAN DONT TALK TO ME! YOUR MAKING IT WORSE!!!! LOL” (omg, men! theyre so funny, i just had to piss myself laughing. it was hilarious, alright?)

FRIEND “fuck. Im going out for a cigarette. you two play nice -dont miss me! um…… guys? im going…. oh fuck it, you havent even noticed im talking mumble mumble grmpf…..”

FISH (stroking Honeys hair and holding her close) “hey sexy ass, sorry that wasnt up to my usual standard. Youve done well by both of us tonight. Youve worked real hard baby. How about I make you a deal?”
HONEY (panting like a moron) “lol. you lebs and your deals”
FISH “no seriously babe, that deserves a reward. you were awesome. hows about I come up tomorrow night and make it all about you?”
HONEY “ok” (lol, like what else was I going to say to that?)

How good is it to get compliments? Fish and zFriend were rather generous witht hem i must say, but ive gotten heaps from heaps of people lately, which is just what i needed actually. Who doesnt love being told their an awesome lay, give the best head theyve ever gotten, are a shitload of fun, happy, pretty, smart, generous, great tits, sexy ass, the ’embodiment of sexy’, intelligent, articulate, sensuous, hot, have the most amazing eyes, an awesome girl, and a truly lovely lady? Bring it on I say!

addeddeddeedd thingy

dickhead was less than impressed about the whole MFM thing. actually, rather upset about the entire NOT HIM thing/s.

i dont know. maybe it can be fixed?

maybe his heart has spoken up? or maybe thats just my heart talking.

he asked how many guys are on the chase. he was honestly shocked at the answer i think (believe it or not, theres quite a queue of hopefuls besides the 4 successfuls so far)

i mean, what did he think? that hes the only man who wants me?

dickhead is an attractive man. a very attractive man. in many, many ways. what did he think? i mean, what man wants a girl no other guy would chase after? and dont the attractive people date people they deem “worthy” of their attractiveness? especially lebs? arent lebs all about appearances, and getting the best they can?


this post is dedicated to someone who used to blog about their debaucherousness but has since retired. from blogging at least. to her i say thankyou for the kind offer on the phone last night. and again, a big w00t from me on your news. mwah. and see, i commemorated your tradition, in spirit if not in details!


We interrupt this blog for a public service announcement

December 18, 2006

Sorry for the mini break but ive been busy

lets just say the Dickhead saga has been like an episode of the Bold and the Beautiful

and my debaucherousness culminated in a MFM threesome last night.

as you can imagine, im tired but happy

normal blogging will resume shortly when many a good tale

have fun (but not as much as me)


Breaking Up Is Hard To Do

December 14, 2006

So how do you get over a serious relationship in record time?

How do you get over a guy you really care about as soon as you can?

Well, quite simply, you go and shag a Random. Fuck him stupid. Take out all your stress and anger and hurt and frustration and everything.

But what the fuck do you do when your sucking his cock and all you can do is think of your man and wish it was him?

You stop sucking and tell the random to “fuck me NOW, biatch”.

But what do you do when it just feels wrong, and all you want is your dickhead?

You send the Random home.

And when things with your dickhead just get worse and worse no matter how hard you try?

You get yourself seriously smattered with a bottle of bourbon and find a Better Endowed Random.

What do you do when you find yourself still thinking of your Dickhead whilst sucking off the Better Endowed Random?

Thats right, you tell him to fuck you. Only this time, you use every bit of mental power you have and focus solely on the physicality of what your doing. You praise yourself for accepting the advances of the nicely sized one, and silently say a thankyou to the sex gods for having him be skilled as well. You count your blessings that he is sensitive to your situation, and are grateful when he suggests a different position, saying things guaranteed to take your mind off your worries. You appreciate that he notices and cares that you could be enjoying yourself more, and submerse yourself when he stops talking to calm your worries and uses his mouth in a more effective form of distraction. You submit to his efforts, and let the orgasms take control. You let your physical desires overtake your mental and emotional ones. After all, being face down, ass up in a frenzy of exertion where both participants have submitted to their bodies most primal desires makes it hard to think!

I admit it. The sex was fucking good. So good I was able to immerse myself in it entirely until towards the end of round four, where, sweating profusely and utterly, totally, and completely spent, I basically collapsed on the bed underneath the Better Endowed Random. It took him about 45 seconds to pause and laugh. “Your completely wasted arent you Honey?” His enquiry was ment with a tired “uhuh”. He laughed, collapsed on top of me, tiny kisses and licks over the back of my neck and shoulders. “Thank god, Hon. I dont think I could go another minute. I dont have it in me to make you come again, let alone me!”

At least I slept well that night. But the first thought when I woke up was of Dickhead again.

So what do you do when you dont know what the fuck to do and you cant stop wishing your Dickhead would call to talk instead of lash out, make demands and make you feel like its all your fault?

Shag a Random Who Makes You Laugh, and try to relax and let the answers come by themselves.

But what do you do when that Random Who Makes You Laugh tells you stories of your Dickhead? When that Random not only has nothing to gain by telling you a lie, and doesnt even realise at first that your push for details isnt merely polite curiosity, but rather an urgent need to confirm that the person of whom the Random Who Makes You Laugh speaks is the very same Dickhead? HER Dickhead? When he gives you a piece of information that feels like a kick in the guts? That you cannot bring yourself to believe, yet has too many points that cannot be ignored?

You dont find much to laugh about with the Random Who Makes You Laugh. Not anymore.