Oh Jebus What Have I Done?

Or so said my FIRST EVAH GROUPIE this afternoon.

Thats right y’all! You heard me! I gots me a groupie! She says shes not a weirdo so I cant really call her a stalker, and weve only had one chat, so she doesnt really qualify……LOL

What the fuck am I on about? Well, I have my comment whores (hiya!) and I have my email tag fans (mwah!) but never before has one added me to msn before! Well, not until today, natch!

Imagine my surprise when some chick adds me and Ive got no idea where from. Of course, I instantly assume Dickhead has been bored in Lebland and has been cruising for chicks for me to fuck (no doubt as a result of the last post – sorry for teh hawtness all!) Oh how retarded of me though! Hes not been trying to set me up with a shag! Its some sheila who ‘parrently has read lots of my shite here and wanted to say howdy and shower me with praise! (Alas no expensive gifts though, whats up with that? Future groupies please note: preference WILL be given according to price tag)

So we had a bit of a chat about all sorts a crap  until Dickhead logged in from the land-of-dodgy-phone-reception-and-electricity-that-is-not-always-available. Fancy that, a place where you go to turn things on (like your computer) and they just decide they dont feel like working right now and say “nup”. hmmmm. Computer says no, indeed?

Or perhaps the title could also refer to what is currently going through Dickheads head right now? In response to the right royal cock up – or to be more precise, cock upS – that i just caught him in.

Wow. This looks like being my very first ever inter-continental break-up! My retarded fucked-up-ed-ness knows no bounds! No longer is my fucktardary limited to just ONE lousy continent……. well, one at a time – Ive been fucked up on at least 3 continents so far, just never more than one at a time! Do I get a supertard cape yet tephs? Surely my own theme song at the very least?

Or perhaps the title could also be about what IM thinking. Maybe about all the money, time, effort and heartache I have poured into this man. Maybe the soul I gambled at the craps table (where else) and have so obviously lost. My die hit the table edge and fell apart! It wasnt even a shit number that was turned up – i fucked it up even worse than just that. Now nobody wins, not even the house.

And now im just being melodramatic and jeuvenille.

And fuck you if you dont like it. The last post was all hot n steamy. And Im a girl. You know theres a price to pay if we share a night of awesome sex! Consider this the next time I see  you at the club, and I bust your balls for not calling me the morning after.

Or dont. See if I care. Its my blog, and ill cry if I want to. Why not, Ive been doing it at home for the last hour. Isnt that what your supposed to do when your man breaks your heart?

So can someone please tell me what the correct ettiquette is for when hes a million miles away, stomps all over it, and then yells at you because he cant fix it from way over there, and its stressing him out? Because I think I must have jugged that day at finishing school. Oh noes! My bad!

Oh jebus, what have I done?

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6 Comments on “Oh Jebus What Have I Done?”

  1. Suvvy Says:

    Too much drama!! You need a relaxing atmosphere. Hell so do I. I am currently dealing with taxes and my hubby’s ex-wife again. We should buy a girls only, no drama Island and hide out there. 🙂 But I’m sure CoyoteMike would find a way to sneak onto it 😛

  2. lori Says:



  3. coyotemike Says:

    Yes, I would sneak in, but I’d bring a bartender’s guide and a drink-shaker with me.

    Want to tell him it’s over? Very simple . . . sell his car 🙂

  4. SS Says:

    You WERE kind to me!!! lol…thanks H 😉

  5. Scorpy Says:

    If you break up by email over long distances I think you have to TYPE IN CAPS…so they can hear.

  6. MikeFitz Says:

    Hunii, clearly there are more facets to your relationship with Dickhead than in MadameBoffin’s collection of favourite diamonds.

    For me, I think it would be dangerous to give you advice, other than to say “Your friends will stand by you, no matter which choice you make.”

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