Honey’s Hot or Not’s

Hot
Getting a phone call to say my boys have heard Im painting my house and are on their way round to help
Not
Having them turn up, ute trays full of beer, and knowing that not only will you get no help out of them, but that you will also have to feed them, entertain them, clean up after them, and call cabs for them in about 6hrs time.

Hot
Buying the expensive “ONE COAT” ceiling white thinking you can just do ONE COAT on the ceiling, ceiling painting being the bane of your existance, and therefore something you dont want to do any more than you have to
Not
Starting to paint with said paint, and realising that the fuckers who painted the ceiling “renters yellow” to match the walls (why oh why?) chose a particularly dark and horrid “renters yellow” and one coat is no way in hell going to stay one coat, and may even end up as three

Hot
Knowing people who can pull apart a gearbox, completely reco it, and get it back into the car in the space of one saturday afternoon
Not
Having those same people be some of your boys who decide drinking beer and fucking whores is more important and dont get around to putting said gearbox back in until Sunday morning.

Hot
Watching your sons football team win their 3rd straight game by at least twice the number of trys than the other team
Not
Having to run your son to the toilet partway through the second half because he “didnt need to go” before kickoff

Hot
Water based paint that washes off you in the shower, so that the fact you have more paint on YOU than on the walls is no biggie
Not
Being busted by visitors BEFORE you made it into said shower

Hot
Having 3 mobile fones so that you can turn some off/choose to ignore certain calls
Not
Having 3 mobile fones so your oupa can call on ALL THREE REPEATEDLY to ask when your going to buy him more coffee, even though he has a corner store 1 minutes walk away, AND 6 relatives that live less than the 30 minutes away that you do.

Hot
Being able to speak 4 languages
Not
Having people try to teach you a fifth incompatible one. No my arabic isnt any good yet, thanks for noticing.

Hot
Having people online email you coming to your rescue when you ask for help
Not
Having them discover the doctor you were inquiring about that is treating your beloved has been disbarred/deregistered in more than one country…….

Hot
The guy I met on Friday
Not
His girlfriend

Hot
The fact that I have pics to accompany the next few items
Not
The fact that I cant find the USB cable thingy and therefore cant post said pics

Hot
My totally awesome tits, which look even extra awesome atm due to pre-menstrual bloating
Not
Having to carry said bloated tits around. They dont fit in my bras, even the bigger sized ones (and why is it so hard to find 16DD/E+? and why are they almost always ugly, and definately always expensive?) and when I took my bra off for some relief the other day, and fell asleep on the lounge, I must have slept wrong or something coz I woke up with a sore tit, feeling like I had pulled a muscle or summin, and was in pain for the next 2 days, wandering around wanting to clutch my boob to my chest, taking the weight off it, but being unable to most the time. I kinda thought they got enough attention as it is in public without me grabbing and holding one as I walk around…..

Hot
My new haircut
Not
the fact i havent had a chance to wax my legs, shape my brows OR get my nails done so its kinda wasted atm

Hot
Having my gf who is like, towdallee sy-kik about when a friend of ours is up the duff, call me to tell me that someone we know is having twins because shes dreamt about it 3 nights in a row, and knowing that theres no way its me (1. Dickhead is overseas, and 2. i cant fall pregnant atm coz of all the meds im on)
Not
Having this confirmed by THE heaviest period ive ever had, with THE worst cramps, bloating and general blergh-ness EVAH, not to mention the fact that I get SUPER HORNY the week before my period arrives, and oh, did i mention DICKHEAD IS OVERSEAS?????? asshole, i so hate you! (now your glad theres no pics)

Hot
That my brain is working enough, and I have time enough to post on my blog
Not
That my brain isnt working as well as it could and ive ended up forgetting half of the good stuff and started rambling instead because im fucked up but still deluding myself that Im ok, therefore looking like a complete retard, and not in my usual “shes fucked up – but in a good way” way, and more in the “thars just fucked” way

Hot
That bugalugs is smart, and worldly, and has enough trust in his mother and the world she has provided, and the lessons she has taught him to be able to handle what he did this weekend in the brilliant manner that he did (and no im not talking about him asking if boobs have bones in them, or if they are just muscles and stuff like a tummy or a bum)
Not
The fact that he had to handle it at all

Hot
Dickheads email the other day, and comments he made recently
Not
Everyone elses, and the self doubts and fears in my head, and a few thousand miles, an ocean or two and a continent and a half………

oh, and just a note to Big Man (which is NOT a reference to penis size – I wouldnt know if he had one, let alone how big it was and would prefer it to stay that way thankyouverymuch) NO DICKHEAD IS NOT COMING HOME WITH A WIFE, SO YOU CAN STOP SAYING SO/ASKING IF HE HAS FOUND ONE YET EVERY SINGLE TIME I WALK IN YOUR DOOR. and even if he DID find a wife, he’d have to have her approved ny me first, coz my sex drive is higer than his, and i can last longer than any man ive met (as most women can say too) so she would be more for me than him.

And really, I could do with a wife…………

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3 Comments on “Honey’s Hot or Not’s”

  1. coyotemike Says:

    Tit pics should definatly be shared with the world.

    Yay for Bugalug’s victory. And don’t worry . . . I had to do the same thing when I played American Football at age 14 😛

  2. suburbanhen Says:

    hehe. us girls could all pretty much do with having a wife.
    i hate painting ceilings too. i mean, really hate it. commiserations.

  3. huniii Says:

    coyote
    then i guess you better find the usb cable for me then! Bwah ha ha! At least bugalugs is in under 7s where that sorta thing is sorta expected

    hen
    i think it should be mandatory that we all get given one. and my arm thanks you, it hates ceilings with a passion


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