Bits n Pieces

diAfter a particularly annoying argument with Dickhead last week, I got so riled up that I threw my $1400 PDA against the wall. And broke it. Beyond repair. Yes it made me feel better. No the argument wasnt resolved, still isnt. Yes I do know how stupid I am. But how good is Ebay? $250 to replace it. Legend much, me.

I bought 3 new pairs of shoes last week. I hadnt worn them yet. Cheeky Miss, the object of my recent lust (and last saturdays threesome buddy) came over, saw them, and drooled. What can I say, she has good taste! (well shes shagging me so she must lol). It took Bugalugs less than 24hrs to draw all over them with permanent marker. Cork bases and permanent marker in assorted colours does NOT a good couple make. He is VERY lucky that I let him live.

Diana Ferrari had a sale. Le Sigh.

I tinted the windows on my new car. That shiny reflective silver tint. It reflects my green paint. Its very purdy. But not quite as purdy as Dickheads. I kicked arse on the tint I chose for that. It is HOT. His car is very recognisable now. If only hed book his car in to get the rims I bought for him put on. I cant wait to see it. Its all paid for, and hes being a slow poke! For once its ME whos chomping at the bit! lol

I may have decided on the rims for mine. Only a handful of wheels fit my car, and most are awful. The rest are imports and expensive. And mostly awful. However there are some purdy little MKWs (12’s for those playing at home) that I think are purdy. 17’s I think, but Im not 100% sure. Sigh. Can never make up my mind.

Honey why are you doing up your car? Because I can. I like it. I think its purdy. And soon it will be shiny and purdy. Well, more shiny and more purdy. And we all know i like shiny things. lol

Dickhead doesnt know why Im still going to work. Most my clients have been set up with a replacement. The ones I care about (only 2 of them) I still go in and see. He says I should fuck work off completely. I know where he is coming from. But. Sometimes I like it. Sometimes I like pretending things are normal, that its not as fucked up as it is. Sometimes I like not thinking about myself and my shit. Accounting is something where you use your brain. And when Im using it to work, im not using it to think, or feel. And it makes me feel smart. Ive gotten so dumb these past few weeks, with my mind not working, its nice to feel like the real me sometimes. Im a clever girl. I dont like feeling stupid. And being there, working, thinking…… its a distraction from the rest.

Dickhead finally took me to see Blood Diamond on Friday. Ive been harrassing him for that for ages. He asked whether I liked it. I did and I didnt. It was very africa. And part of the movie i will have to google, because I do believe that one scene was filmed on a location about 50kms away from where my family lives. Seeing as alot was nth africa, some was different, but really, africa is africa. We have mountains like that at home, its just the view from ours is a bit greener. The violent scenes are ones every african knows all too well. As i explained to Dickhead, the things portrayed and alluded to where actually pretty tame. When I related the sort of shit that went down at home a few yrs ago, he was shocked. Actually, the things I have personally seen, and had related to me by family and friends that they have seen irst hand (as opposed to urban legends or he said/she said stuff) meant that partway through I had to stop watching. I actually turned to him at one point and said i wasnt sure how much more I could watch. I sat it out though.

The movie was mostly good. It did a good job illustrating a few things. Maybe viewers didnt get it all. I dont know. I know I did, but I understand. Thats not to say that those who dont are fools. Theres alot of pain in the world. No-one can be expected to be knowledgeable in all of it. If you were, I think it would send you mad. 

Leo did a piss poor job of an accent. And the Afrikaaner words he dropped here and there? pfft. Leo, take your money and go buy your woman something lekker, hey bru?

There were a couple of lines used in the movie that Ive had people speak to me about. “This is Afrika” is one, and yes, things in africa are different. Even without seeing the movie I was able to agree and explain that one. Africa marches to the beat of her own drum. Things back home work a totally different way to here. Fighting that will get you nowhere. Africa will always win. Things are always done her way. You cannot beat her. The sooner you realise this the easier things will be for you. Sometimes its a good thing, sometimes the african way is better. Most times its not. But its africa.

When talking about the colour of the soil, that Archer will never leave, there is a saying, but its not quite how the colonel put it. Africa’s soil is red, red with the blood spilt over her. Hearts and bodies bleed over her. Every africans heart and body has bled. And will continue to. Something I said to Aurs, which he commented a little while ago that he had seen validated by others who had never heard me say it, is that you never leave africa. Even if you jump on a plane and come over here, even if you only went there to visit, once you have seen her, you take a part of her with you in your heart forever more. It truly is like going home. You feel her. You belong.

They say human life was born in africa. They say she is the motherland. They say you can never leave.

They are all right.

What really worried me though, was the scenes of civil war near the end. Of rebel forces driving through the streets mowing people down. Sth Africa has problems. Big ones. Men walk through the streets with guns now. Gangs of youths armed to the teeth do as they please with noone to stop them. Our police and armed forces are corrupt, and most will take a bribe from one side and look the other way….. straight into the outstretched hand of the other side offering another bribe to do the same. Things are not working. The country is falling apart. Right now, the smaller factions are all too small and self absorbed to do too much. Their satisfied witht heir lot. But one day, one of these will look up, see what more there is, and realise they have a chance to have it. One group will realise that they can join with another and REALLY have some power. And god help us then.

Oh and Leo, when you told the story of your mothers rape and murder, and fathers decapitation, all of which you witnessed as a 9yr old boy, and then asked “boo hoo, right?” You were right. Thing is, most south africans, nay, most africans, have a story like that to tell. They dont tell them. Because EVERYONE can match it. Like I said, every africans heart has bled.

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2 Comments on “Bits n Pieces”

  1. womanforlife Says:

    Fellow South African? COOL! 🙂

  2. huniii Says:

    ja, retge boer!

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