is decision day

yesterday was awful

there is a huge dickhead post brewing. if i can get the energy. i need to vent, but ive got no energy to do it. its catch 22. 23 even. coz that would be harder, right?


i am out of the hospital

for now

have been for a while

but will be back soon

there is an opportunity to possibly get better, but its VERY VERY SCARY.

should i take this slim chance, it would mean a very big risk of being dead, like, NOW.

so its time to decide.

do i want to spend a few weeks with bugalugs, have another chrissy with him, and then leave him parentless?

or do i gamble those precious few weeks on the slim chance that I can see him grow up?

dont help me. this is one i need to decide all by myself.

im just bitching coz its hard

and im a wuss and a sook

today at least

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6 Comments on “Today”

  1. Indiana Says:

    The fact that you were able to still write about the question in your mind and not solicit opinions suggests that you aren’t quite yet a “wuss and a sook” and are still being brave.

  2. Scorpy Says:

    Wuss and Sook???? Never, I think we may be doing more crying and wussing than you. We are here ready to read and listen to your rants, vents or rhetoric banter 🙂 Take care Hun 🙂

  3. Wuss, you? I don’t think so. What the hell is a ‘sook’?! I’ll keep checking in but sending warm hugs and good vibes your way in the meantime.


  4. Mia Says:

    A barrel full of hugs my dear.

  5. huniii Says:

    bravery is a fragile facade

    umm, i think NOT. you should see my puffy eyes. and i have pimples! PIMPLES! I never get pimples, not even at that time of the month, not even as a teen, or whilst pregnant

    wuss? me? ‘fraid so. and a sook is like a cry baby. or like me. same/same

    a whole barrel? W00t!! Me likey!

  6. MikeFitz Says:

    Whatever you decide, if it’s *YOUR* decision, it’ll be the right one. Best wishes.

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