Uh Huh

So welcome to the idiot who has hit this blog 8 times in 2 days under the search “sex with my muslim girlfriend”. Well done you wanker.

So another meme ive been tagged on, for reasons of amusement. Well ha ha ha ha ha. I didnt even orchestrate it but ive managed to un-funny-ify (yes thats a word) it.

5 Things Meme (5 groups if not 5 individual items, anyway)

IN MY HANDBAG
2 Mobile phones, 1 handsfree cordy thingy, 1 bluetooth handsfree

Sunnies

Pack of smokes, cigarette case (yes I do see the stupidity here), lighter

keys

lippy.

IN MY REFRIGERATOR (I had to add freezer to get to 5)
(Dickhead pissed himself laughing at the prospect of me writing this bit – he’s always bitching that I have nothing to eat in my house)

2 Bottles wine (one chardy, one sparkling, but both DEFINATELY white)

1 bottle coke (to go with the spirits on top of the fridge)

Jelly (for bugalugs)

Half a loaf of frozen bread (for bugalugs’ toast)

2 bottles Vodka

(can I add the intention to have some milk in there for coffee? Actually, despite this we eat well, just most of it at my grandparents place because I care for them too. Im actually a really good cook and a bit of a health food freak)

IN MY CLOSET
Shitloads of shoes

Shitloads of clothes (including about 30 pairs of jeans)

Shitloads of makeup and assorted beauty products

A few boxes up high – contents unknown because theyve never been unpacked (i moved in about 3-4yrs ago)

A bunch of handbags I never use
IN MY CAR IMELDA tagged me for this because, and I quote “coz I’m laughing my arse off thinking about how many pages she’s gonna need for the contents of her car!” to which Dickhead said, laughing, and I quote “fuck yeah, she’s right on that”. So here goes (for the daily driver):

2 tickets for parking, 3 parking fines, pretty-smelly0thingy i still havent put on the airvent, 2 keycards, assorted coffee club cards/discount cards for hair/nails etc, a million fuel receipts, rego papers, greenslip & pinkslip (still), 8 assorted peices of unopened mail, 5 lipsticks, 2 lipglosses, 6 perfumes, 2 teabags (dont ask) $87.95 in assorted $5 notes and shitloads of coins, 3 pairs of shoes, a cardigan, clean shirt & jeans, tampons, spare fuses & lightglobes (including 2 fuses that were for my VH commodore that I sold over a year ago that wont fit this car, ciggarettes, 4 lighters, case for my stereo face that I never bother to use, as well as the remote for the stereo that I also dont use, approx 500 CDs, in car chargers for both my phones, plus charger for my bluetooth and its USB adapter, 2 archive boxes worth of files etc from clients (but not in archive boxes, just strewn through the boot) Dickheads laptop, keys to my office, Bugalugs’ overnight bag, 3 matchbox cars, 5 Mcdonalds happy meal toys, 2 invoice books, street directory, Bugalugs’ sunnies, 13 pens, 1 highlighter, 2 mascaras, compact, tweezers, 1 nail polish & 1 top coat, 2 emery boards, moisturiser, makeup bag (with no makeup in it) 3 flash drives and a pile of scres that ive forgotten where they go, 6 phikllips head & 2 flat head screwdrivers, 16peice socket set with 2 extention bars, 3 floor tiles, 2 listerine pocket packs, 1 toothbrush & a condom.

Yes Ims & DH, I did clean it out recently. About 1 – 1 1/2 weeks ago.
 

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2 Comments on “Uh Huh”

  1. Imelda Says:

    OK. That is officially the closest I’ve ever come to wetting myself while reading a blog. Did you sit out in your car with a fucking notebook and make a list or something?

    P.S. You forgot spilt champagne.

  2. huniii Says:

    notebook? yes, but the electronic kind not the pad & paper kind

    and I didnt forget that. i chose not to include it along with the 500 other things that have been spilt in there.


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