not fair

and i dont care that im acting like a child if thats what it looks like

that argument today was just horrid. and im really having trouble with a few things. that im not being believed, and trusted – i know theres a reason, but it still hurts. especially since i have trusted that person before when i had a reason not to.

the timing – i just give you a gift, a rather thoughful and slightly expensive one, and one that was to apologise for my recent insensitivity and for your faith in the exact thing you are yelling at me about not believing me on.

the 3 things that made today a significant, difficult and emotional one for me, which you knew, and still brought this up anyway, and in addition, the fact that we were in public and on a limited timeframe. very not fair.

the fact that you know how i feel about this issue, that im under stress and pressure and feel immensely guilty about it, dont do guilt well, and have major guilt things going on with it being what day it is

the fact that i couldnt say what i wanted to, that you interrupted and wouldnt let me speak, yet i had to let you say your part

that we couldnt resolve it, and had to have it in parts with interruptions.

that you said what u wanted and left without me saying what i needed, or defending myself, and left me feeling like absolute shit because you didnt want to talk at that moment for fear of regretting something you might say

that it ALWAYS has to be like this – you saying what you want, then leaving when your ready, and me being left to deal with my feelings in the meantime. that you feel better and leave me with the consequences

that this happens time and time again, which makes me feel like you dont care what it does to me

and that your ABSOLUTE WORST TIMING EVER IN THE HISTORY OF HUMANITY to do this to me today, of all days, which you were completely aware of. couldnt you hold your tongue for a more appropriate time? i have been on stuff i need to say to you, cant you give me the same courtesy you demand of me?

and stop bitching about me having crap timing and coincidences when youve just done all that to me

its not fair

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